I’ve been traveling a bit lately. I have no complaints about that, but let me tell you – I am TIRED. After every trip, I really enjoy recounting descriptive details that stood out to me about each destination. I try to capture the moment in words so that I can read it later and be taken back to that moment; what I was feeling and where I was at in my life.

The problem with the traveling I do is that it leaves very little energy to feel inspired to take the time to capture these thoughts and feelings before they disappear. I crunch my patient caseload into 3 days so that I can take an extended weekend without using PTO. I come back feeling more run down and then repeat it the next week. What I’m getting at in this word vomit of a blurb so far is that I am beginning to realize I need to take more time for me so that I can enjoy travel more. I am very fortunate to have a job with that kind of flexibility, but I still feel like a slave to “accruing vacation time”. It is truly an awkward balance of working to have money to travel, but then not having the time or energy.

My poor grandmother has been such a good sport listening to my quarter-life-crisis rants every Tuesday (Tuesdays are our conversation days in case a season of Bachelor is on, so we can talk about it the next day). I usually blame my student debt or my love of Thai take-out for my financial burdens that limit my ability to travel and do what I want with my life. Every time I feel inspired to take a chance on my dream life, reality comes crashing down. Which is a good thing probably, but definitely the opposite of uplifting. Maybe it’s all this Seattle rain.

The new year is fast approaching. With that new year I suspect a lot of upcoming changes. I think we all owe it to ourselves to stop making excuses and to start doing what we love. Life is too short to do anything but what makes us better people and the world a better place. I know what my ideal life path would be, but I don’t know how to get there. Not yet. Does that mean I should keep doing exactly what I’m doing and feel uninspired when I finally get a chance to reflect? I know I sound like an “entitled Millennial”, but I’m really tired of living for the weekend. When I opened this blank word document, it was supposed to be about how grand the Grand Canyon was, but I guess this was weighing on me. If anyone wants to hold me accountable to the resolution of “no more excuses”, please hit me up. Mmmkay, bye.